 |
jimsal My Name(s):Jim, jimbo, jimy, juice...lol
Born on:Sept. 16th (Virgo)
My job: Dead-end factory job...lol
What I Should Be Doing: Recording Engineer, Playing in a band or solo performer, writing songs for famous people, writing more childrens' books or doing comic strips if not playing music
What I used to do: Everything you could possibly do in a Perkins restaurant, Assistant manager at Circle K, Jewelry/Watch repair @JCPenneys, and drummer in a rock band!
Dreams: to see the day when someone famous records one of my songs.....to make my own CD(s)
Loves: Family, animals, making all kinds of friends on the internet, and MUSIC!!!!!!!!  
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
 |
 |
Friday, December 23, 2005
Shopping, Wrapping, and a little partyin' and Freezing in Florida!
Well hello everybody!....It's been a hectic week trying to get all that shopping and wrapping done!!...i finally finished the wrapping last night and now trying to get the house ready for a Christmas party with a few friends tonite. But it never fails....after i think i'm all done with everything, there's that one gift we always remember we have to get. I can't mention it just yet, in case my wife decides to check my blog out. Heck, she knows this blog kinda exists, but she's not one to get on the computer much. She's on one all day at work, so she doesn't care to be on one when she's home. She always has so much other stuff to do. So, maybe i could say what it is........NAH! Not yet!-lol!.....I would like to thank my good friend Darkangel for making this cute little stocking for me here. She is so talented putting these things together. Check out her site listed on my sidebar, "Darkangel's Lair".....she's got all kinds of neat stuff on there and a funny video to boot!
Well, i may live in florida, but it got quite COLD last night! It dipped near freezing temps last night and we got ourselves a little frost too! Of course, that's when we found out our brand new $3,500 air conditioner decided it didn't want to give us any heat! The a/c worked beautiful this past summer, but this is the first time we needed heat and it's not working!....We nestled under thick blankets last night(a rarity in florida since most of the time you need just a sheet and a floor fan!). I even thought about wearing sweatpants,but no way.....i did wear socks which i can't stand, but the situation warranted it at this time.
Well, i had to stop with the blogging right here for a moment because the doorbell just rang.....it was my neighborhood a/c guys! Yay!.........we now have heat!! Man, that sounds weird for a florida resident to be wishing for heat...lol...it is supposed to be in the low 40's-high 30's most of this week! But i guess it makes it more Christmasy that way, which i really don't mind. We get to bring out those sweatshirts, jackets, etc that collect dust in our closets every year..lol..so used to just wearing shorts. I actually love the cooler weather this time of year, because it's our only real change of season, except "rainy season" which brings on "hurricane season". Pretty sad a state has so many hurricanes, it has to name a season after it! It's amazing after being born and growing up in the Buffalo, New York area that i would feel cold in 40 degree weather! But i guess what they say is true. After living down here for 20 years, the body does get acclimated to that florida sun. As many times as i have wished to move back "home" to new york, i don't know if i could handle the winters anymore. I remember what is was like to shovel snow in -10 degree weather,but does my BODY remember???? I truly don't think so....i know i couldn't handle it anymore.....
I actually got one gift early this year and i've had it for 2 weeks.... but i put it under the tree anyways and haven't touched it yet (except for reading the manual) and that was my recording system so i can play some of my own songs and put them on a disc and maybe put on the internet soon(after the holidays)....of course, it is NOTHING like the great recording system/programs that my guitar teacher has, but it'll at least let me play around with it whenever i have free time and i won't bother bud with his increasingly busy schedule...he's got himself more students to teach, his own songs to write and practice and eventually get his new cd going....it's alot of work...but bud will put that aside to help others with anything they need....a very good man.....i think alot of that is the "teacher" inside of him...he and his wife i believe are out in california at this time enjoying some vacation time, much needed probably!
Well, i would like to wish each and everyone a very Merry Christmas(if you celebrate it) and all others to have a joyous Holiday season and New Year's!!! May each and everyday bring you joy and happiness and positive things your way!!! ENJOY!!!!
Posted at 09:43 am by jimsal
Permalink
Friday, December 16, 2005
Last night's concert, video shoot and other stuff....

Hello everyone!---i guess you can see by the above picture, who i enjoyed more at the concert last night--lol! The concert was very good overall, with Lee Greenwood being the headliner, and my dad loved the show. It was gift to him and that's what really mattered. But, the only thing that was disappointing was it turned out to be a Christmas show. Oh, don't get me wrong. I love Christmas shows. But it was NOT advertised as such, so most people there were expecting a regular concert of hits by the two stars. Which is why i liked the Crystal Gayle segment better. She would sing a few Christmas songs, then a few of her hits, then back and forth again. So it satisfied everyone. And the reason i put this pic on here (obviously from "younger" days), is i thought she didn't really look much different now from then....oh yes, a little older, but still absolutely stunningly gorgoeus. And I had a seat in the tenth row, so i was quite close. I know, you're going to say all the make-up comments and face lifts etc...heck maybe so, but it didn't look that way to me...she just seems like a natural beauty to me. But her voice was great....she wore a gown that Cinderella would have been jealous of, and that long. long, hair! Wow!...lol!
Now, Lee was good, great even. But when he announced that he was doing all Christmas music, and was doing no country songs or hits, the people all had that sad sigh and did it loudly. And Lee stopped, and jokingly said, "ok, let's tear all the Christmas stuff down...." But he said, he wanted to do this to spread the holiday cheer around and express the true meaning of the season, which was fine. But he then said he heard Crystal's set backstage and heard that she mixed her hits in between, so he said he would at least do "God Bless The USA" because of the fact we still have troops overseas and he does alot of shows for them. Of course, he got a standing ovation for that. Otherwise, it was Jingle Bells, Winter Wonderland, etc.....but great show overall, and my dad was very pleased, which is what really counted.
Well, i'm heading out to do some final shopping. I know what i'm getting and it won't take me long, because they are at places one wouldn't normally go shopping for Christmas presents. So it'll be easy.
I love working with people of all ethnic backgrounds. Everyone there KNOWS i love The Beatles, and are always quick to run over and let me know when a Beatle tune is on the radio. What's funny to hear, is when they try to sing some of it to me, either in a different language or a heavy accent of some sort. You name it, we have people from everywhere. Cuba, Puerto Rico, Russia, Japan, Phillipines, Poland, Peru,,,,.. Well, one of these friends of mine comes running over and says, "Jeem(Jim), da beatohs, da beatohs...."when am see-fee-fo!"(when i'm sixty-four)...lol...i about fell out of my chair....the funny thing is, i've worked so long with these people, i actually understand them!!!
My guitar teacher, Bud Buckley, had his video shoot wednesday night and it went very well. I was surprised to have his wife come over and grab me to do an interview on the video--lol!...i was a little nervous at first, because i thought i might just sit there and stutter and stumble all over my answers...lol....so i'm anxious to see how it all came out! I probably looked like a goofball!!
A few entries ago, i mentioned i was finally getting into writing a few tunes, something i have totally been dried up on lately. I wrote a couple verses down here, and now after reading them again, there are going to be alot of changes! It sounds too corny to me and generic, full of cliches etc....i'm trying to almost write this song(no title yet) like it was an Irish beer drinking song...lol...there are writers out there(you know who you are) that are great with writing in metaphors and deep intellectual thoughts, or just plain have a much higher level of vocabulary than i do....so here i am thinking, "i've got to try writing that way...." but i can't picture writing an irish beer drinking song that way!....lol....maybe the song will be ok for what it is, i don't know....i just know i want to change the lyrics...oh well, we'll see what happens!...ok....gotta go...get that shopping done and other chores for the weekend....have a Christmas party to go to on saturday and visiting my wife's sister and her new born baby on sunday....oh yeah, can't forget football!!!---Have a Happy New Year and Merry Christmas everyone!!!
Posted at 10:11 am by jimsal
Permalink
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Cyndi, DJ Party, video shoot and more concerts!

There's a reason i adore this woman besides, well, looking beautiful...LOL...there i said it! I think Cyndi is beautiful!!!....lol!...I recently saw Cyndi in concert and sat in the 3rd row, right in the center...and it was a great time. The things i love about her are sometimes thought as being annoying to other people. And i understand that. That combination of pixie voice, laced with the brooklyn accent....(or wherever in New York she is from)...she comes from a very Italian family, which my whole mother's side is, so i can relate to many of her stories.....her sense of humor is so cute....she has eyes that literally smile and sometimes(like the picture above) a face that looks like a porcelain doll.....soft, delicate and........OH....um....ok....uh...got carried away there...what was i saying?...oh...very talented and professional in every way....and did I say she could hit notes only a dog could hear? My Lord, i knew she could belt out a tune, but you will never appreciate it like i did sitting where i was!!! WOW!!!....is all i can say. They put on a very excellent show. Yeah, i know....i probably would say she put on an excellent show if all she did was strut around and snort like a horse...lol!!....Me biased?....NAHHHHHHHHH!!!
My guitar teacher, Bud Buckley, is having a video shoot done tomorrow night, which my wife and i will attend. Maybe we'll get to mug for the camera...lol.... I was going to put up the fingers behind his head like rabbit ears, but i don't want to get kicked out or anything....my luck, i'll spill my coffee on his shirt or belch while eating my meal. Don't worry Bud, i'm just kidding.....what's that? We don't get to eat???? Sereiously, i've never been to a video shoot before, so this ought to be alot of fun!
The DJ'ing i did for the Christmas party went well, except people started to get a little too wild at the end of the show. People wanted to sing,(we did a little karoake during spinning discs), but the same people wanted to sing over and over and over......one 40 year old woman(who acted like 7), didn't want to give up the microphone when she was done. We had another person coming up to sing, but this lady wouldn't give my wife back the mic! She kept yelling, NO!NO!NO!...then they started stepping on my chords and all of a sudden my sound got cut off....at first i didn't know what happened, but when i saw about ten people fighting for the mic like a frikkin' mosh pit, and my wife pushing them forward, i realized what had happened....my wife finally got the mic back and order was kind of restored.....well, only because we were lucky it was the end of the night and we were able to shut down...lol....and my wife works with these people...a little too much tipsy wouldn't we say???? But it's over, it was a good time for the most part, and we and the equipment made it home safe.
And, on a final note, i'm taking my dad, for an early Christmas gift, to a concert this thursday. We are going to see Crystal Gayle and Lee Greenwood, definitely alot different than the concerts that i'm used to going to. But i'll watch any kind of concert(except rap)..lol). I've always liked Crystal Gayle. I never followed Lee Greenwood, but he's known for that famous song, "God Bless The USA". What's funny about seeing him though, is the guy who wrote the tune and sang my song "Less" is named Jon Conley. He has been the guitar player in Lee's band on different occasions. Wouldn't that be cool to find out he was playing thursday! We have seats in the 10th row, so we'll still be pretty close!
Oh, and Cyndi.....PLEASE come back soon!!!!....lol!

Posted at 04:38 pm by jimsal
Permalink
Saturday, November 26, 2005
Well, i found out yesterday, why i don't ever participate in "Black Friday"...you know, that's when people wait in line at a store at 1am to get in at 5am.....heck, some even wait from 10pm the night before....to me, that is down right crazy....sure, there are "great" deals(?), on a first come, first serve basis....but i for one, don't think it's worth it.....i have to get up as it is at 330am to go to work, why would i want to be at Wal-mart at 5am??.....i'd rather get up at 8 and just hope for the best....if what i want is there, ok....but if it's not, i don't care. I'll just get it when they get more in....even if i have to pay an extra buck or two....I never go shopping the day after Thanksgiving....but this time my wife wanted some things she saw in the sunday ads that she wanted, so i decided to take the jaunt out there. Besides it was at a Bell's store that really wasn't very busy when i got there. ALL kinds of parking was available. After all, i had the ad with me, i knew exactly what i was getting. So all i had to do was get in the store, pick the items off the shelf , pay for them and leave....presto! Done in 5 minutes, huh? WRONG!............
Well, i guess since i was a rookie doing this, i had no clue...lol....I walked in and the amount of people was normal, i thought. I walked back to the jewerly dept. I noticed many different tables set up in the aisle with all kinds of boxes on them. I did a quick scan of the items, not seeing the 2 pieces of jewerly my wife wanted. (Now mind you, i was at this store 2 days before looking for this stuff but had no luck....i told my wife and she went the next day saying there were 3 left). But i thought, "no worry", i will ask the lady at the counter(at this time there were only a few people around). I showed the lady the items and she took me to the table where the items SHOULD be.....of course, i noticed there were 5 levels of shelves on this table which looked to be about 500 or more boxes on them.....she tells me unfortunately, there are alot of boxes to look through, but i thought that's ok, i can do this.......i start noticing there are more and more people crowding around and i'm starting to get a little warm.....of course, one of the shelves was close to the floor and with my luck, they would be down there. So i get down on one knee and bend down to look. Needless to say, this was quite uncomfortable but the only way i could get down there to look. Now i feel more and more people are crowding around the area and it's getting warmer. All of a sudden, i get banged into with a shopping cart. Person actually says "sorry", and i say "no problem". Not 15 seconds later, i get nailed with another cart. Same words are exchanged , only i hear a little mumbling from the person who hit me afterwards. Then someone steps on my hand, and now i have decided this isn't a great idea after all. I get up in my feet and noticed people elbow to elbow all around me. I went through the rest of the shelves and sweat was literally dripping off my forehead.....to no avail, i leave the area with nothing....i was able to pick up other things my wife wanted in the store, but the jewerly was a no-go.....maybe i can get it on-line......but that's all i wanted from Black Friday.....it's worth it to not fight with the crowds and pay full price....lol....so beat on each other ladies and gents, run each other down with your shopping carts, fight for parking spots, or your places in line, I will wait patiently until it's over........
Posted at 12:36 pm by jimsal
Permalink
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
The top horrible karoake songs plus a new tune in the works....
There are songs out there that i liked until i started going to a restaurant that offered Karoake every friday night....At first, it was funny, because as some of us know, karoake is not meant for "stars".....some of them that sing awesome use it as a platform to show off, or "compete" with others...you know, that one-upmenship mentality....but others don't give a crappola how they sing...they're just friggin' drunk and want to "belt" out one of their favorites...THAT'S actually what it's all about...lol...i've had the pleasure to even run a few karoake shows in my lifetime for friends who were in the business. And believe me, it's something i would never want to do on a regular basis. People decide to start swinging mikes around their necks, spilling the beer they couldn't let go of when they were called up to sing....not to mention having to call their name several times because they were too drunk for their name to register in their brain, or they were in the john getting sick in the stall or outside smoking a cigarette.....and of course, couldn't carry a tune in a paper bag....but that's ok. The problem is, The Bad Singers of America must have a convention every year on what songs they will drill into the ground and make people file for the nearest exits.....lol....I truly believe they get together and pick a handful of songs that they will sing(well, TRY at least to sing) and do them over and over and over until we all are carted out in a straight jacket......
Now i've been going to karoake off and on for probably the last 10-15 years....having been in a rock band before, i tend to get the old itch to sing a song or two once in awhile. Heck, i have my own professional system at home, so i don't even have to go out anywhere.....But i'm sorry.....unfortunately there are tunes i really used to like that are on my "i wanna choke you for singing that song" list. Because, after all these years, i have yet to hear anyone sing it IN TUNE!!!! And then there are those that have been sung good once in awhile but have heard a bazillion times......The List:
1)Teddy Bear by Elvis
2)Cat's In The Cradle(and a long song at that)
3)Stairway To Heaven(around 8 minutes long)
4)American Pie(need i say how long this is?...)
5)Those Summer Nights(from the movie "Grease")
6) Paradise By The Dashboard Light
7)New York, New York
8)My Way
9) Margaritaville
10) House Of The Rising Sun
There are more....i know there is......but it's giving me a headache just thinking of these listed here....lol....
Well, let's get away from that for now. Somebody shoot off some fireworks, put on a parade, or whatever....i have finally, after months of drought, started putting together a SONG!!!.....Man, it's been a long time....and wouldn't you know it, i go and cut the tip of my pinky finger and work, the one i use to play the chords so here i am trying to play my new song with a bandaide on my pinky....lol...kinda tough to do! But i didn't do too bad....i don't have a title for this yet but it's kind of and Irish style tune using 3/3 time, like a fast waltz...(but don't do a waltz, do an Irish jig or something like that...lol)
Here are a couple of verses i've jotted down so far but not etched in stone yet....
"Untitled"
©by Jim Salhoff, 2005
1) Your message was clear,
So why didn't i hear what you said,
Your grip was so tight,
But to me it felt right in my head
Everyone knew your act was so phony,
They saw just how you controlled me,
If you had a gun, rest assured, I now would be dead
2)You all tried to warn me,
But i thought you all lost your minds,
Yeah i thought i struck gold,
And with the constant glow, I was blind
Everyone told me all kinds of reasons,
Why my heart will be bleedin',
Keep at bay, I'm OK,I will show you that all will be fine
Well, that's it for the moment...i need a bridge and another verse or two, so we'll see what i can come up with....I've been trying to implement little pieces of fillers and riffs(learning how to do that instead of just strummin' along) and the song i picked to be my first project with that is "Sally Won't Wait Forever", which was written for my dear friend Sally, whose blog "Dirty Blog" can be seen by clicking the link on my sidebar....get to know the person behind the story of the song for instance....lol....and thanks to Bud, my guitar teacher, who has to be one of the most patient people i know as i slowly plod along with learningt all this new stuff lately....after awhile, i can see some things are finally falling into place as i try to learn more and more.....it'll come....it'll come......
Posted at 08:38 pm by jimsal
Permalink
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Stealing my radio station and Bud's vidstone...
Hey!!!!!!!!!....someone's stealing my radio station!!!! A LONG time ago, i had this idea for a radio station.....my friend was a new and upcoming DJ for our local station in western new york(where i believe he may still work today). I have always had a liking to be a radio DJ myself, but i wanted to go into sports broadcasting(my way of thinking was i get to see all these ballgames for free--lol!)...so i started out being a journalism major but somehow got a degree in elementary education. But that's a story for another time.....i always told my friend that wouldn't it be neat(yes, we said NEAT back then!) if we could start up a radio station and play just whatever the heck we wanted? Didn't matter....play some rock 'n' roll, then throw in a country tune, maybe a barry manilow and then KISS....lol....of course, he looked at me like i was bonkers (yes, we said "bonkers" back then!).
I wanted it to be called W.A.N.T., "We Play Anything That We Want!".....well, you guessed it...my sister calls and tells me that someone is starting a new kind of radio station where they are gonna do JUST that...play whatever they want!....so someone is going to get credit for my idea....not to say, i still couldn't start up a station myself doing the same thing...they said instead of a playlist of just 100 songs, it could be more like a thousand!....of course, that's the idea, right?...i will have to get more detail on this, where the station's from, etc....But my idea has been a long standing joke in my family and relatives for years...i can't believe someone finally came up with it and is making it a reality..........
My radio story just cropped up yesterday, but there is another blogger here that recently had the same situation happen to them. The difference is my radio station could make me money, but my guitar teacher, Bud, could have been a millionaire......He thought up an idea some 20 years ago(i think) about having an actual video of a person's life placed inside a gravestone!....you could open this little door where a screen would be and watch a biography and possibly their accomplishments in life, whatever! of the deceased! Now alot of you may immediately say "EEEWWWWW!"........but remember! This isn't a video of the dead body in the casket, decaying....yuck!!!.....but an actually biography or memories of the loved one. I'm sure Bud got roasted over the coals by his buddies on this idea, so of course, Bud leaves the idea alone....so what happens? Someone just came out with the idea of "Vidstone". Exactly what Bud was trying to tell everyone a few years back....go to budbuckley.com and scroll down a couple of entries in his blog section to see an actual picture of what this guy came up with! Unfortunately, for Bud, he snoozes and loses...i mean, who would have thunk????...as for me, i could still open up W.A.N.T. Radio station.....i can play all the bud buckley, kim brunner/mesmeriah, serena matthews and jeff hightower music i want....lol!!!
So i guess the lesson today for everyone is, the next time you get a goofy idea that no one else has come up with, and your friends all say you're nuts, that's an indication you better "Get 'Er Done!".......maybe then you'll finally be rollin' in the dough! (yes, we said "dough" back then!)............
Posted at 05:50 pm by jimsal
Permalink
Monday, October 24, 2005
Whimsy tags me-so here goes:
Feeling......relieved we got by hurricane wilma with no real damage
Listening to....you won't believe this but The Best of Runa Pacha Inka World
Am currently working on.....this tag thingy that Whimsy made me do on my blog--lol!
Spent last night......getting up at 3-4am and sitting in living room watching weather channel as hurricane wilma hit land..... wind gusts of 50+mph winds
Had breakfast of....coffee and pop tarts
Missing......pieces of wood that i was supposed to use to board up my windows,thus, we didn't board up at all
Thinking of......how i finally have to go back to work tomorrow after 12 days of vacation
Would love to......win the lottery so i can be on vacation forever...lol
Planning to......NOT win the lottery and have to work the rest of my life
Wanting to.......get more songs written and do some recording
Favorite time of the day is........home after work with my loved ones
Really hate.....cigarette smoking, taking drugs,and alcohol abuse
Always wanted to play......professional football
Dreaming of a........way to get my songs recorded
A dream come true is when......everything that you dreamed and hope for comes....well....TRUE!
Would love to french kiss.....Catherine Zeta-Jones...lol(what kind of question is this?--lol!)
Tags go to: DarkRose, Darkangel, venisha,and kim!!!!
Posted at 03:40 pm by jimsal
Permalink
Friday, October 21, 2005
Doobie Bros., The Beatles, vacation and hurricanes
Well, this has been a good vacation for us as we wind it down....Got to see the Doobie Bros. in an awesome concert...we sat in the 11th row on the end. Patrick Simmons, the guitar player and vocalist, decided to come off the stage and run up the run-way right next to us and play a little solo. Our neighbors went with us but had seats on the other end of the aisle...of course, i had to look over at them and rub it in that he was by us....lol....

We also went to see The Beatles exhibit at the Florida International Museum. Unfortunately, it wasn't much to see...and it cost 10 bucks to get in. Now, 10 bucks is actually cheap to get into a museum exhibit, but this, to me, was worth about 5 bucks, and i'm a major Beatles fanatic! There was some neat stuff, all collectible stuff this one guy had, which i got to see memoriabilia that i've never seen before......they had a set of drums and all the guitars that they had in the 60's...but it mostly was black and white photographs on the wall with a little writing about each photo....some i've already seen in countless books...then we were told there was an "81 minute" movie to watch....i sat down and realized i had seen the movie before....it was a dvd of their first u.s. visit, which i own and bought at walmart....it took us about a total of 20-30 minutes to actually go through the thing....i spent more time in the shop buying stuff(a Beatles cartoon lunch tray and coffee mug and keychain...lol)..i'm not afraid to say that my Beatles collection of memoribilia would have added alot more to the exhibit....i have my original blue lunchbox from when i was in kindergarten, an ice cream wrapper, rulers, pencils, medallions, gum ball machine items like rings, charms, etc...original 45's with picture sleeves, bubblegum cards,figurines,the list goes on and on.....
And of course, we still sit and wait to see when Hurricane Wilma will come our way. Last i knew, we were 2nd on the strike probability list, tied with Fort Meyers and Marco Island, with Key West being 1st....and now they are saying a possible tuesday hit....still haven't boarded up any windows yet, so hoping to know more on that tomorrow.....we have a place to "run" to if it gets too close....we also have 2 dogs to worry about and we won't go anywhere without them...
But all in all, vacation has been mostly a week of rest and relaxation, watching football and the baseball playoffs, with hockey and 'rasslin' tucked in there now and then...we're going to go do a little singing tonight...diane's working on some Doobie Bros. tunes....lol....
I'm starting to get back into creating some songs...i've been in a very big drought lately, about a 2 month drought(maybe even more). I've got partial words written for 3 songs, and i came up with the beginning of some music while practicing...whether it fits anything i'm writing is left to be seen....so, right now, we are going to try and enjoy the last 2 and a half days of our vacation, and hope the hurricane leaves us alone......
Posted at 04:00 pm by jimsal
Permalink
Thursday, October 20, 2005
Well. it looks like we really have to start watching old Hurricane Wilma!We are 3rd place on the chart from stike probability with Key West and Marco Island ranking 1st and 2nd.....tied with us for 3rd is Fort Meyers as of this morning...Not boarding up windows yet, but will know more about that tomorrow....supposed to be 70% chance of rain tomorrow, and since we are on vacation this week, we will make the best of today before we get all the terrible weather!....I think Bud, my guitar teacher may have already headed north, but maybe not with Wilma taking her good ol' time(which is quite alright by me)...Monday i go back to work, so hopefully we will all be ok by then....say a little prayer for us down here in south florida!!
Posted at 08:39 am by jimsal
Permalink
Monday, October 17, 2005
When Did The Weirdness Start?
This was a cool story that'll get you thinking.....by Mark Patinkin
I was filling my tank with regular when I heard a woman's voice on the other side of the pump. She was talking on a cell phone. I peered around. She was very nicely dressed, and wearing expensive heels. It seemed incongruous to see someone like that with a gasoline hose in her hand. It got me wondering: When exactly was it that we became service attendants?
There happen to be alot of areas that get me thinking that way. When did going to prison become a good career move? When did Google become a verb? When did television reporters, especially male ones, all start crying on camera?
When did teenagers begin feeling they need to be more available by cell phone than doctors are? When did "debug" start applying to software instead of exterminators? When did "major airline" start equaling "bankruptsy"? When, without even intending to, did we start calling people in India 2 or 3 times a week? When did poker become the new Monopoly?
When did an obnoxious kid turn into a behaviorally disordered child with impulse-control issues? When did we find ourselves having entire conversations with recorded messages when we call directory assistance? When did people start saying, "I'll send you a JPEG," instead of, "I'll show you a picture?
When did half of female America get breast enhancements--and have each step chronicled on their own reality television hour? When did it become national policy for boys to show off their boxers and girls their midriffs? When did people start having playlists instead of favorite albums?
When did heartburn turn into upper esophageal acid reflux? When did kids start saying, "I'm Good," instead of "No Thank You"? When did we have to start shuffling shoeless through security to get onto an airplane? When did 98% of personal mail start arriving with a computer-beep instead of stamped envelopes?
And when did junk mail all focus on enhancing male body parts, restoring hair, or getting cheap printer ink? For that matter, when did ink cartridges start costing more than a printer itself? When did the most important measure of speed switch from miles per hour to megahertz, and now to broadband and megabits? When did it become an STD instead of VD?
When did 15 year olds start going to coffee shops? And when did adults start going to coffee shops to get the equivalent of a milkshake? When did we start spending more money to protect our computers from viruses than ourselves? When did every woman under 28 get an exotic tattoo just above the hindquarters and when will they realize the tattoos won't look quite as alluring when they are 70?
When did it become fashionable, as opposed to sloppy, to have our bra straps showing? When did everything in our lives start needing a password? Finally, when did everyone decide they needed an SUV? Which reminds me, I already need to go fill up my gas tank again. Which will cost me.....do i dare add it up? Sixty dollars.....And when did that start???
Posted at 12:06 pm by jimsal
Permalink
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|